I can’t not blog about this.
This semester has been the worst.There has been a lot of good things, but there have also been so many things slowly chipping away at me.
Classes are overwhelming. Work has been stressful the past few weeks. My grandma, who has lived with my family for the past 8 years, is about to pass away. My apartment flooded. Trying to figure out apartments next year was a huge pain. I have been itchy for 13 weeks because I’m allergic to my detergent or A&M construction or GOD KNOWS WHAT. I raised support for the first time. I interviewed 20 times for a summer internship. I’ve tried to hide from so much stress, which has only increased my anxiety.
To quote one of my dear roommates, “Jesus told me I’m despondent.”
And sometimes when I just feel so tired and stressed and despondent and I just want some comfort, I turn to my favorite movie, Little Women.
I don’t know why this is my favorite movie, but it is. I love the family, the warmth, the innocence and simplicity. And I love firey, independent, writer chacters like Jo (and Skeeter from The Help, which I recently finished reading), even though I get upset every time Jo says no to Laurie, even though it’s probably best for them in the end.
Well, last night I couldn’t turn to the movie because it’s in College Station, and I’m in Arlington. So I turned to the book instead, which I have recently started rereading on my new Kindle. (Side note: I love my Kindle so much even though I swore I’d never want one. At some point I will write a whole blog post on it.)
I read Little Women once in high school. but it had been so long, and it was free on Amazon, so I started up again a few weeks ago. And tonight I came across this quote that I had to share. I’ve already read it about ten times tonight.
“…I have a better friend, even than Father, to comfort and sustain me. My child, the troubles and temptations of your life are beginning and may be many, but you can overcome and outlive them all if you learn to feel the strength and tenderness of your Heavenly Father as you do that of your earthly one. The more you love and trust Him, the nearer you will feel to Him, and the less you will depend on human power and wisdom. His love and care never tire or change, can never be taken from you, but may become the source of lifelong peace, happiness, and strength. Believe this heartily, and go to God with all your little cares, and hopes, and sins, and sorrows…”
—Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
So it’s Easter, and honestly, I haven’t specifically thought much about Easter recently. I haven’t really given Jesus the proper reflection he deserves lately. Don’t get me wrong; I’ve spent most of this semester calling out to Jesus to save me from this spring. But I haven’t paused to think back on why I can call on him, what he did for me at the cross.
So thank you, Louisa May Alcott and Mrs. March, for pointing me back in the right direction this Easter. Because of Jesus, I don’t need to be despondent, even when the site of my planner gives me a panic attack. The Lord is faithful.